Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Another prayer to share

I prayed this for several months before the surgery when I was told by doctors they didn't know what my cyst was, that it could be cancer, and they might have to take my ovary out along with the cyst. This prayer helped give me much comfort and peace. I pray it can do the same for you.

Dear Mother of Confidence,

I come before you in my weakness and need trusting in your motherly care, and in the love of God "who has done great things" for you. I give you all my problems, my doubts, and even my sins. And I ask you to give me your own limitless confidence - in the tenderness of God, and in the power of Jesus your Son. Teach me the joy and freedom of abandoning all in His hands. Together with you may I behold God's presence and His power at work in my life. I thank you for leading me to rise above my troubles and cares. Help me to accept all that befalls me with serenity, and to ask for all I need with expectant faith; that I too may be able to see and to say that "He who is mighty has done great things...for me." Amen.

"You cannot learn this from books, you must experience it in your life, that whatever you ask Our Lady she will do.." - Mother Teresa


May God Bless you.
Maria Therese

6 comments:

Anne (aussieannie) said...

Dear Maria, I hope you have had a good appointment with your doctor earlier this week. Also, here is my email connected to my 'Tota Pulchra' beads business, I'll help step you through making rosaries if you like: anne@allbeautifulcatholicbeads(dot)com

LifeHopes said...

Hello there, I just read your blog and I can relate.

I am Catholic, married and dreaming of a family, and had stage 4 endometriosis removed about 7 months ago. No BFP yet, but hopeful.

My surgeons specialize in removing advanced endometriosis and they have a 50% pregnancy rate with stage 4, which is excellent. Did they remove any of yours when they removed the cysts?

If you'd like to read my blog, you have to subscribe, so send me an email at: lifehopesnow@gmail.com and I can invite you.

andnotbysight said...

Hi Maria,

I was just catching up on your blog. I hope you got good better news at your appointment this week! I am trying to remember whose blog it was . . . but I felt more hopeful recently when I was reading on someone's blog about a friend of theirs who had a child at 48. It could be that the doctor hasn't had many endometriosis patients who are over 39. And, of course, God can make anything possible. I'll be praying for you!

deirdre said...

I wanted to post this for you here :) I posted it on the previous site.

Marie Therese, I have read some of your blog, and hope it's ok to post here, and then will pop back over there. I have had endo for almost all of my life (started having pains around 14 or ), and I believe you are born with it. I do not believe endo can be ''treated'' with progesterone. I have taken progesterone for 6 years and love it. It stopped my migraines. It helped lessen some of my heavy bleeding. I wish I had known about it when I was a teen, because I had PMDD (when no one talked about it). It's helped with that. It did not cure my endo. I had to have surgery last year (wish I had had that before), and it was removed from my bladder, my colon, and so many other places. My colon had uterus had become adhered together, along with other adhesions, because of a previous fibroid surgery. I wish I had used progesterone earlier, because I belive it would have shrunk the fibroid so much earlier.

Please know that all this talk about women not getting pregnant past a certain year is crazy. Is it harder? Probably. But women have been getting pregnant at all ages for years. If you are in your 40's, and don't want the chance of getting pregant, I best most secular ob/gyns would recomment the pill for their patients. One of my friend's moms when we were in college was on the pill for this reason! And she was definitely in her mid40's. YET, these same ob/gyns will tell you that you need their help, or a ''fertility expert's'' help to achieve pregnancy at the same age. It's crazy and the deck is stacked against so many women if they go that route.

Not to be crass, but look at the woman who is involved with this scandal with John Edwards! She is just about 42 or so.

Work with your NFP, but be sure to get your records to someone like Dr Hilgers, who knows women have the desire to have children. Who does not see children as the ''commodity'' that so many other doctors sadly do. Surgery might be the answer for you.

I absolutely know of one woman who was told she could not have children because of her endometriosis. She went on to become pregnant less than a month after her surgery. Yes, she was younger, and that helps.

I know of so many miracles in so many ways. People who are ''told'' by doctors that they have two years to live because of their cancer, and yet are alive years later.

Fertility is no different. God is great, amazing, and generous and kind. Celebrate Him as you do, thank Him for the burdens and crosses. Your site is inspiring me to return to the Rosary, which I used to also say every day. We are beacons of goodness and how struggling helps glorfiy Him. I have told doctors I use natural progesterone and in their pill-obsessed worlds, they don't understand it.

This is an inspiring site, http://www.mothersover40.com/

There is a long history in Ireland of women being mothers over 40. And look at the mothers in their 40's who have been in the news recently because of their 15th or 16th baby!!!

Do your best to be in your best health, and let God help you. I try to offer my sufferings up for the unborn. How many children desire to be born, and how many mothers desire to be connected to those children?

Sorry for going on. I get very emotional when I read these things, because it's hard enough to go through these things, let alone in the field of medicine where everyone is SO secularly-oriented. I get very sad in obg/gyns' offices when I see all the ads for the pill. They prescribe it to girls at such a young age!

deirdre said...

I just wanted to post one more thing. Many women have gone through what it seems you went through. After 35, women's progesterone levels start to go down (I think I had problems in high school, past a certain date). Then we end up with more endo problems, fibroids, cysts, polyps, etc. Doctors always then tell us they don't know what's causing it, could be cancer! I have gone through this...These doctors seem to know so little about progesterone, about how it can help us not have these problems, how it helps with migraines (haven't had one in 6 years), and prevent or stop miscarriages in circumstances. But in the end, it did not cure my endo, which is what I had hoped for. Surgery has helped me so much, and in the process I've learned of so many women conceiving post-op. You want a real expert, who knows how it can help you, or its limits.

You might try googling dr hilgers, or visiting his website, naprotechnology.com if you haven't.

There are also at least one or two doctors across the country who have learned from him, I think. I can continue to look into anything - what area of the country do you live in? I e-mailed you, please feel free to e-mail me back. Take care, God bless.

deirdre said...

This is an article a friend passed on from a wonderful priest,

''Infertility…

“As painful as Mom’s dying was six years ago, including her not living to see me get married, it is a far greater suffering that I experience every month when I realize that we have not achieved a pregnancy.”

These are the words of my younger sister Terese regarding her and her husband Darwin’s painful struggle with infertility. Yet, on October 7th, 1995, as the thousands were cheering the arrival of Pope John Paul II to Giants Stadium and the Meagher and Rigel families were doing our own cheering and dancing as we celebrated Terese and Darwin’s union as husband and wife, such suffering was the furthest thing from this happy couple’s minds.

My sister was my parents’ 6th child and is ever so grateful for their openness to life in such a generous and sacrificial way. She and Darwin were eagerly looking forward to welcoming their own blessings from God, and were immediately open to as many children as God would give them capacity for (physically, emotionally and financially). They were ready to be parents, and understood that waiting to have children would quite possibly mean missing an “opportunity” of eternal significance – being co-creators with God of a creature of inestimable value - a human person. Yet, despite their openness to life, they painfully experienced a very sobering reality and mystery - that children are a gift from God and not a right. After 6 years of trying, they were still unable to conceive.

I will never forget the conversation that I had with my sister when she told me of the pain and anguish, hope and discouragement they were experiencing through all this. When hope rises and falls so many times it is so very hard to keep the faith. She also shared with me how it was a great challenge at times to trust in and to uphold the Churches moral teaching in this area, both in the testing and the treatment options (to achieve pregnancy). Distraught like so many other couples, they made themselves available to the tests, treatments, and prodding of multiple doctors.

With much effort and struggle they educated themselves not only on the various “medical options” and the Church’s sexual and medical moral teachings sheding light on those “options.” With every new doctor, they were casually presented with various “options”, which often amounted to one offense after another against the sacredness of human life and of the sacredness of their marital union. The standard “option” they were presented with again and again was invitro fertilization (IF). This procedure involves the creation of multiple human embryos (i.e., human persons) outside the womb, for the purpose of reinserting into the womb, or for experimentation in a laboratory.

Most offensive (and paradoxical) to them was the basic reality that those multiple embryos created in the petre dishes, were their children, including the “spares” for later “use,” destruction and/or experimentation. This “elephant in the closet” was the most disturbing of all the aspects of the IF procedure. Yet, obscenely, it seemed hardly an issue with the doctors and technicians who at times seemed more interested in cashing in on their intense anguish and longing for children.

They were told that modern science, held out a promise to provide the fulfillment of their hope - the child they “rightly should have.”
They also discovered that they were not being adequately informed about the potentially serious physical side affects upon the woman of many of the common treatments being offered by the medical community. A further surprise was the emotional and marital/relational issues IF helped create or at least exasperated in the marriage. Medical science alone, void of the Gospel, unsubmitted to an authority greater than its own, will always leave one unsatisfied and painfully unprepared for the realities of life.

For Terese and Darwin, there were times in which the Churches’ teachings served as an anchor in the storm of intense human longing. At other times that teaching served as a rudder to guide them in navigating the waters of modern fertility medicine. They were guided with the help of those teachings and some support of other people of faith, as they labored to set a course for their future family; or rather, to allow the Lord to set that course for them. They wrestled with the thought of “jumping ship” or to board a passing “luxury cruise liner” of medical promises that declares itself to be the answer and authority, based on the notion that “what can be done (biologically), ought to be done.” Each procedure or practice promised to take them out of the storm and into the peace and joy of giving birth to the child they so longed to have.

The “problem” was that they already knew the truth – that they were not the authors of life, nor could they claim a right to the children they so deeply longed for. They knew that the only true option for them was to stay in the Boat of the Church and to ride out the storm. How long that storm would be or where it would cast them they did not know. But what they did trust is that the Captain of that Boat was Jesus, and that His Blessed Mother, and all the Saints, virgins and martyrs, husbands and wives, mothers and fathers in heaven, were with them encouraging and guiding them along the way. And although they were very “sea sick” from all that was occurring mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually, they knew that they would eventually come to a safe harbor.

What they initially thought of as their safe harbor, the birth of a child, has not come. Yet, they have discovered that there is much peace and joy which is possible in the midst of this and the other storms of their lives. What they are seeing more and more, is that this peace, is not, as they sometimes thought, in achieving their will, but is only in the will of the One who out of his perfect and extremely generous and sacrificial love, created and redeemed them, and desires that they share in his very life here on earth and then finally in glory – the only true safe harbor.

Thanks be to God, they are now the adoptive parents of 4 beautiful children ages 4-9. The youngest of which - Joseph - is my godson.

The anguish of my sister and her husband is all too common today. Such intense suffering of infertility, apart from an awareness of God’s love guided by our Catholic Christian faith, can make a couple virtually insane – spiritually, morally, mentally and emotionally. The strain upon even relatively healthy marriages can have dire consequences.

“How as Catholics are we to deal with such anguish?”
“Where is God in all this?” “Does He even care?”
“What about all the IF children?”
“What difference can I make, I’m not a scientist or a doctor?”

These questions and more will be explored in the next issues of the Catholic Advocate…
''

This is by Fr Joseph Meagher of the Newark Archdiocese, in NJ. he is the ProLife Director, I think.